#21: Arctic Monkeys - Whatever People Say I Am, That's What I'm Not (2006)

1. The View From The Afternoon
2. I Bet You Look Good On The Dancefloor
3. Fake Tales Of San Francisco
4. Dancing Shoes
5. You Probably Couldn't See For The Lights But You Were Staring Straight At Me
6. Still Take You Home
7. Riot Van
8. Red Light Indicates Doors Are Secured
9. Mardy Bum
10. Perhaps Vampires Is A Bit Strong But...
11. When The Sun Goes Down
12. From The Ritz To The Rubble
13. A Certain Romance

I think this speaks for itself really.

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Ah, 2005. I was lucky enough to catch Arctic Monkeys when their shows used to sell out in days rather than minutes, shortly before a little song called 'I Bet You Look Good On The Dancefloor' ram-raided the British public's consciousness and saw four guys from Sheffield become British music's next great hope. It's still ubiquitous on dancefloors throughout the country (and probably the world), the combination of guitar-thrashing intensity and pop-culture referencing lyrics making it both an instant and lasting hit. By the time January 2006 had rolled round, the hype had built to ridiculous levels, and with it came a massive weight of expectation on the band's debut album, Whatever People Say I Am, That's What I'm Not.

But let's step back from that a little. Opening the album is 'The View From The Afternoon', a song that would eventually become a pseudo-single as the lead track of the Who The Fuck Are Arctic Monkeys? EP. Beginning with a blast of guitar that's as raw as its lyrics are razor sharp, it serves well as a statement of intent and an introduction to the band's world. Not that a statement of intent was necessary: That had come even before 'Dancefloor' with the one-two punch of limited early release Five Minutes With Arctic Monkeys. The first hit was the scenester-baiting 'Fake Tales Of San Francisco', mixing a funky bounce with scathing put-downs of sub-par wannabes. The follow-up was 'From The Ritz To The Rubble': Positioned brilliantly here as the penultimate track, it sees Turner spitting lines like some hyperactive Yorkshire MC railing against cuntish bouncers.

Indeed, many of the songs here were already familiar to legions of loyal fans who'd downloaded demos of them that were freely available on the internet. But the raw potential of those demos was fully realised on the album. 'Dancing Shoes' and 'Still Take You Home' get additional sonic punch, while 'When The Sun Goes Down' was beefed up into the form that would see it become the band's second number one hit. For me, however, perennial fan favourite 'Mardy Bum' has lost a little of its lustre due to overexposure: But try telling that to everyone who's still chanting along to the song before Turner's even started singing.

The band weren't so caught up in the whirlwind of hype that they didn't have time to write a riposte to the sneering naysayers who never thought they'd get off the ground: 'Perhaps Vampires Is A Bit Strong But...' sees Turner's barbed lyrics matched with weighty, distorted guitars to provide one of the album's darker moments. There were other new tracks too: 'You Probably Couldn't See For The Lights But You Were Staring Straight At Me' barrels through a tale of a girl who's got the whole club wrapped around her finger, while 'Red Light Indicates Doors Are Secured' details the recollections and regrets of a night out during the taxi ride home.

And it's the snappy, observational lyricism of Arctic Monkeys that's the real draw. Turner speaks simply but poetically in words that everyone can related to: Drunken texts in 'The View From The Afternoon' ("...and there's verse and chapter sat in her inbox, and all that it says is that you drank a lot."), extortionate taxi fares in 'Red Light Indicates Doors Are Secured' ("How come it's already two pound fifty? We've only gone about a yard."),  the blurred haze of the morning after in 'From The Ritz To The Rubble' ("Last night what we talked about, it made so much sense... but now the haze has ascended it don't make no sense anymore.") -  even on 'Riot Van', the album's sole 'slow' number, the lyricism holds up (And up rolled the riot van, and these lads just wind the coppers up... they ask why they don't catch proper crooks). It's all wrapped up neatly on final track and perennial set-closer 'A Certain Romance': It's a neat summation of the world the band live in, and unsurprisingly it's a world that's familiar to anyone who's lived in (or even just visited) the streets of Britain in recent years. I could go on and on about the lines that bring out a smile, a laugh, or an appreciative wince in me, but I'll spare you - you can listen to the album yourself for that. 

Some fail to see the appeal of Arctic Monkeys, or struggle to understand what makes them stand out from the crop of observational indie bands that seem to permeate the genre, while others decry them as 'overhyped NME bollocks'. And as the demo swappers and early gig goers will tell you, it's simply the following: Witty lyrics that are both well written and well delivered, and songs that hook you from the first listen with an undeniable catchiness. It's not rocket science, and it never claimed to be - Whatever People Say I Am, That's What I'm Not is just a fantastic debut record by a really fucking good band - and that's what they are, even if you say they're not.